La-Tessa
and sometimes you just need a hug.
This is the predicament I found myself in this weekend. As you know, I am working on my wip and writing is much harder than I ever thought it would be. I have a WHOLE NEW RESPECT for all authors, whether they are published or not.
Sitting down to a blank computer screen everyday is more than a little daunting. Especially when you have the added pressure of trying to create something that will invoke a positive response in an editor, publisher, and/or agent.
So, like most people, I have a lot going in my life right now. I know I’m not the only person on this planet juggles a full time job, a family, a household, & personal interests/hobbies. I’m usually pretty good at handling the day to day stress of my life.
However, this weekend was NOT one of those times.
I got so frustrated with my lack of progress on my wip and the lack of creative inspiration that I had my first crisis of confidence this year. Late Saturday night, as I stared hopelessly at my blank computer screen– a screen that was just begging for some words, any words, to grace it’s presence– I thought about just chucking the deuces at my attempt to complete a manuscript. One of my favorite song lyrics is “Someday I’ll fly, someday I’ll soar” from John Mayer’s Bigger Than My Body. I’ve adopted this line as a mantra of sorts, as I work towards becoming a published author. And for the first time this year, it did nothing to for me.
Thankfully, my critique partner stepped in this morning with words of encouragement and some good advice & helpful tips on staying productive. Then she nonchalantly requested my writing goals for the week and sent me hers. As though I did not just pour my little heart out to her in my Benadryl-influenced, sleep deprived, “swan song to the writing game” email.
It was a spiritual hug of sorts and soothed those wayward doubts of mine, allowing me to refocus my efforts. So I have a new writing plan this week, one that does not consist solely of me churning out another chapter. Instead, I have varied my goals to allow me to work on different aspects of my writing, so that if the devil (that is doubt) raises his head, I can either laugh in his face and power through, or I can turn my attention to another aspect of my wip that will get me another step closer to completing it.
So for any of you who experience the same highs and lows on the road to accomplishing your dreams, in the words of Tupac I urge you to “Keep ya head up”.
Anjuelle Floyd
Tessa:
It is hard as an author. I have only one book published and I am about to launch another into the world.
Let’s just say my life is CRAZY–both because of writing the book–and even without the book. I am the full-time wife of 27 years and mother of 3, ages 21, 16 and 10.
I never feel like I’ve done enough. And when I feel fairly good at what I’ve accomplished in my writing life–like getting to the desire word or page count for the day (which is rare–and I always feel my work could be edited and made better)–I sink into that terrible mother feeling.
When I manage to think I’m a fairly decent mother I fall back into demonizing the quality of my writing.
It never stops.
And I’m a psychotherapist to boot.
Let me just say what I heard an 80 year old poet say when I attended an alumni conference for MFA program.
Seven minutes.
“Writing 7 minutes a day puts your stamp on the day.” This is what the octegenarian Marie Ponce told those of us sitting in on her talk.
Having lived over 80 years and working as a mother and writer for most of that time, I had a great respect for what she said.
I held even more when, after autographing her book of poetry that I purchased, she reminded me once more–“7 minutes.” She tapped her forefinger on the table and said–“It’s hard writing and being a mother and a wife.”
I say the same to you.
Be kind to yourself.
You’re doing some pretty amazing things.
Writing, wifedom and mothering are no easy tasks–never mind how much we love and enjoy those we care for.